Exactly, Mouse--even if T is on a break-- you are still here, and T exists. You are able to stay connected, there is proof in your insights.

I told my T last night that I wouldn't use his psychoanalytic couch because then he would be behind me, and it would be like he wasn't there.

I mean the guy would be 2 freaking feet behind me, but I would feel like he 's gone.

I still have a lot of work to do. Mouse, I hope that one day I can get to the point where like you, I will have a realization that T still exists, even if he's not directly in front of me.

I think you do wonderful work.