Hi, I am in recovery from SI. I have been hospitalized, but it was for sucidal thoughts--I just happened to be self injuring at the time, but that is not why I was committed. My depression actually started making me a bit psychotic--thats not as bad as it sounds. I just stared into space and was unable to respond to stimuli--my brain went off to lala land. But, I am getting off topic. I tell you this because the hospital I stayed at was rather nice--it helped me get out of the danger zone. Yeah, the food was bad and it was boring, but most the nurses, aides and pdocs were pretty good--they really wanted to help me. There were some pts who were a little bit more...well, had more severe mental issues, but they did not bother me. I was ina room with one other person--a regular bedroom with a window--that did not open. I was in the "padded room" twice (isolation room). As I was coming out of my "daze" the outside stimuli became too much and they let me go there to chill out. Really, it was the best part of my visit. I was all alone, in a completely safe room with no way to hurt myself. It really calmed my mind down. Sometimes I think about going back, knocking on the door and asking to be put in the isolation room for awhile. Well, that is just my experience. Lucky, it was a positive one. I hope you do what you need to do to take care of yourself. If hospitalization is required--go in wiht a positive attitude...there is no need to be real scared, although yeah, at first I was a little scared. It is not a sign of weakness and it does not mean you are crazy--it just means you are getting the help you need. Hopefully, you can manage this without going to the hospital, but do whatever you need to do to keep yourself safe.