Thank you everyone for your replies. After sleeping on it for the night, I am feeling a bit better. I don't know whether I will fall apart again, but for now, I guess I'm getting a break from it.
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Originally Posted by Ambra
I'm sorry HazelGirl.
I don't think you are angry and hurt for no reason.. you have probably brought up things that had been resting for long, lately, and it feels like everything has just happened, again, whatever it is.
I found out that I am feeling *worse* than before but I like to think it is a good sign of healing wounds in the best way, reopen them, get the right medication and let them heal the right way after processing things. Don't know if it makes any sense. Unfortunately it takes much longer than just ignoring them and probably the thing to do is to acknowledge the pain and anguish. But this is a transition phase..
How are you doing at your new place by the way? Do you keep a diary or do you think there's something that might help you vent or take out your feelings without inhibition?
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I do have a diary, and that sometimes helps. But not always. Sometimes, I feel like it's all trapped and blocked inside there and nothing I do will let me vent it out. I don't have the words or the ability to express it and I end up feeling stuck in it, like it's attached to me and won't come off. I don't move through it, I get stuck in it.
My new place is nice. Thanks for asking. I am enjoying it so far.
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Originally Posted by InRealLife45
:-( I'm sorry.
Can you get hold of a yoga or qigong dvd? it helps to get your body moving and focus on something else.
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I would like to learn yoga, but that requires time and money, both of which I am short on right now.
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Originally Posted by _Mouse
We have to feel that way at times. Those feelings are our guide posts.
They seem unbearable at times. But we did survive them. I'd take it as a sign that you're stronger than you imagine. We can't feel what we cannot stand.
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Something I realized last week was that all of the things I'm feeling and going through were things I felt and dealt with as a child. If they're so overwhelming as an adult that I can barely function, how much more overwhelming were they as a child? No wonder I dissociated away from it all and shut down. That's the only way I could survive.