Hello Zpe: I will second everything Plzsti wrote. I will also mention, I used to work with people who had sustained back injuries. Back surgery is unpredictable. I have low-back problems as well & I won't have surgery. Have you had any physical therapy for your condition? I have &, again, I can't say it was that helpful for me. But that doesn't mean it wouldn't work for you. I walk quite a bit; and I'm careful how I bend, stoop, squat, & lift. This has been the most helpful for me. With regard to work, have you looked into whether of not there might be some type of vocational services available to help you find & retain employment? I know some states offer more of this type of thing than others. But it would be worth checking into, if you haven't already.

I think, in general, your title for your post was on target. You've hit a new low in your depression status. It is DEPRESSION that is causing you to do, or not do, all of what you describe here. So you need to do the things that are necessary in order to treat your depression. Although, as PC'ers, we're all more than willing to read each others' rants, what we really want for one another is for each one of us to heal. That can only occur when we take our med's consistently (if we have them), see our therapists & / or pdoc's as scheduled, & do whatever else we need to do. I know it's difficult. I'm as guilty as anyone. But it's the bottom line.