None of my family have a clue as to who I really am. Even the few close friends I do have, they really don't know me. I think the only person I'm myself around is my husband & that's cause I have very little-to-no fear that he will not accept me for who I truly am, not just the version of myself I present to the world. I kinda feel like that Chuck Palahniuk line from Invisible Monsters: "if I can't be beautiful, then I want to be invisible." I might have paraphrased the quote, but who cares. It applies to me because if I don't have praise and positive reinforcement & people telling me I'm a good person, then I tend to prefer to just be invisible. I'd rather be alone on this earth than have to hear one more criticism or dig at me. No matter what people know about you, they only know what you are willing to show & sometimes it's best not to show them anything. That's how I'd like to feel sometimes. Invisible. Just everyone walk right by me and don't say a word. Don't even glance in my direction. Don't offer your advice. I want to to somewhere by myself & be able to enjoy San Diego w/every person within a few yards of me has to look my way & smile or even worse, try to start a conversation. I'm very antisocial today. And this was just another rant I guess. Sorry for anyone who had to go through the bore of reading this post.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk