Feeling a bit calmer (at the moment) been a mixed day.

Found out that they were unaware of my overall medical issues and that a prior operation (within 3 or 4 years) was causing a complication in my medication... Took to me saying unrelated and unknowing that they didn't know that I was having a physical problem for them to do a double take and change my meds around.

In the mean time I'm in a bit of physical discomfort and what would be a simple fix that I can self administer will not be allowed as I'm at risk.

Waiting for the on call doctor.

I am however sticking with it for now. Had a few anxiety attacks during the day and thoughts of dieing (slightly outside the box but worked out solutions should those thoughts became intent).

Though I've said the above that is not how I feel right now.. Calm(ish) just trying to rest. Looks like I will be having supervised leave, so I can get out for a bit (observed) which should be a welcome relief.

Downside, my mum is coming up from London this Saturday to visit me which is going to be awkward. Love my mum but we just don't really talk and had an uncomfortable chat with her this morning with her quizzing me over things she may have done wrong in the past. Gah.

I will however be allowed to go see my T this Monday if my wife accompanies me.

Is weird being in the position where your movement is monitored...