Thank you, I think you may have clarified some things up for me, I find it strange that I am in my 20s, a working professional and seem to know very little on the subject as a whole, I wasn't even sure if I was technically suicidal or if it was just a convenient way to think at the moment. I think I was confusing myself on if I was suicidal or just had an ide in my head of how to do it. I created more confusion and anxiety about it by not understanding it.