What I try to remember is our experiences help us manage our expectations better in adult life. I am not much of a "dreamer" because I've learned having appropriate expectations is better than thinking about nebulous goals which may or may not happen. It's also helped me have realistic expectations about other people.

To this day, I still feel like an outcast. My siblings are younger than me and bonded together better than they ever did with me. They're also closer in age so it may have to do with that. However, I was the odd one out because I lived far from the family who were closer to my age. When I reached young adulthood, I couldn't relate to a lot of the other people who were 20-21. Most of the people I got along with were older, and I think my "old soul" and mature mindset was the reason why. Now, when I join groups and talk to people I am aware I can't relate to a lot of their experiences. I don't know what it was like to go on family vacations because my parents couldn't afford it. I never went to summer camp, or joined the Girl Scouts. I didn't participate in extra-curriculars because my parents couldn't afford it. It was what it was. There's nothing wrong in admitting that.

Even though my past may have limited me, as an adult I have so many more doors open. I decided a few months ago-- as in really decided and got fed up-- that I was not going to allow my past or people now to limit me in what I want to do. I spent too many years being limited and I am going to go out and do what I think is fun and enjoyable and will lend to healthy mental health. I didn't have those options as a child and if you ask me I wouldn't want to relive childhood.