Greetings everyone. I stumbled across this board when I was researching my new diagnosis of BPII. After 20+ years of fighting "depression" and bulimia and being resistant to every antidepressant out there I finally had a full blown manic episode in December. I blew my 12 year sobriety when I vacationed at my parents house and just drank myself into oblivion and then drove around picking fights and flirting with homeless men finally ending up at a 24 hour Walmart where I bought pretty shiny things and outfits for my boston terrier. Then I crashed and was suicidal. I almost checked into the hospital but my p-doc added ativan and I slept for a couple days. P-doc finally diagnosed me BP and added lamictal. I slept for 4 weeks straight. Thankfully I have a very good support system and my mom took care of my son and all his school stuff. Now, I feel semi-alright. I still rapidly cycle like crazy but I feel much better than last summer when I was only on prozac, gabapentin and topomax. I worked at my son's school this whole year and made no friends (who can you trust???) but the kids were wonderful and it gave me a reason to get out of bed. I'm worried that now school is out I'm going to fall back into my hermit ways. I'm really glad I found this forum. It makes me feel like I'm not the only one on earth feeling like this. I look forward to getting to know everyone.