Not all gifted women think they are freaks. I believe you and I are of about the same age (50's), so we grew up in the same era of education. You are right. Gifted programming really didn't get its impetus until the 1980's and is still evolving to this time. So, would our education be handled differently today? Sure, but I didn't suffer because of my giftedness. I had a great education and have had a great career.

Many gifted individuals do have a hard time feeling any kind of empathy or connection to anyone they feel is not as gifted as they are, but that is a trait that we do work with our gifted students to get beyond. That lack of empathy, that sense of superiority that is so "normal" for them, can become a life problem for them if they stay stubbornly unwilling to engage with others and acquire an ability to empathize rather than criticize.

Your pain seems to have less to do with your giftedness than it does with how some traumatic events in your life prevented you from reaching your own goals for yourself. Lack of proper gifted education didn't do that. You made it to college. It was what transpired outside the educational setting that got in your way from what I can gather from your post.

I don't know much detail about you. Is there a reason that at this point you can't continue your college education? It's never too late. My sister didn't finish her college career because, like you said, she ended up taking care of her husband and family and putting herself on the back burner. She was ultra-responsible (and gifted by the way). She went back to college, finished her degree, and started teaching at age 50. I even had an 83-year-old woman graduate from college with me. If you thrive on academia, perhaps returning as a student would be renewing for you. I suspect you'd find you have more in common with most people than you think. Just a thought.