You've got some real stressors. I tend to get paranoid at times but I recognize it for what it is and can talk myself down and rationalize it.
My hope is that you can get settled soon. Everything is so up in the air for you right now.
FWIW, given your situation, you're hanging in pretty good.
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The struggle you're in today
is developing the strength
you need for tomorrow
Don't give up
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