I had a difficult session today. Talked about another memory that came up Saturday night. Of course it was preceded by 3 weeks of anxiety, bad dreams, and depression. Another cruel thing my mom did that could have killed me. I feel like hell! In the session I was confused and irritable. When I drove home I was numb. The anxiety was intense. I'm getting head aches on and off. I tried watching a movie to distract, but it didn't work. I warned my husband that if I got irritable don't take it personal. I can't bring myself to tell anyone about it. Just my T knows. What do you do with s**t like this?

I don't know what to do with myself. I don't feel like anything is real anymore. I'm not real. I feel like a zombie.