Although I very much appreciate that you were quick to comment, I don't know that I find what you said helpful - in fact it actually feels a little frustrating and dismissive. Obviously it's hard to get emotions across in words over a computer so its all left up to interpretation of the reader but what you suggested has been done. I've talked with people, I've made adjustments, that's why I'm here. I'm trying a completely different direction for me, one that makes me slightly uncomfortable, hoping for community and support. Again, I'm sure it was meant to be supportive and I appreciate that much I'm sorry but I feel a little annoyed by it.