Like that says I miss them. I feel like an idiot.

At least when I was having those thoughts it was a ray of light. An out if I was ever brave enough to take it.

Now, it's like I'm traveling down a long dark tunnel with no hope of exit. No change. Nothing.

I don't enjoy life. I tolerate it.

How is it that I have no wish to actively remove myself from something that I find no interest in? Why have they gone? Does the fact that I don't feel them now mean I never really wanted to die anyway? Maybe I imagined them? Are these sorts of feelings just supposed to disappear? Does it just mean I'm getting better?

I don't know anything right now.