I am absolutely floored by the paperwork I received from my pdoc. In March I went to the E.R. with suicidal ideation. I asked my pdoc (he works in that psych ward) about my hormone levels but was dismissed. So, I was misdiagnosed as having a PTSD psychotic break, spent 5 days repeating the sordid details of my life, left more traumatized with incorrect medication to treat my misdiagnosis, and I was on such high levels of these meds I was dizzy, light headed, blurred vision, double vision and so mentally impaired I couldn't remember my zip code. So, after 2 blood tests I am told I have no estrogen in my body and am in the middle of menopause.

When I went to my pdoc to pick up my disability paperwork that keeps my student loan in deferral, I have the highest rating ever a 55 on the GAF scale. WOW! Disability lawyers often won't take on clients with this high of a score because they don't make a good case. And in the session notes from that meeting with my pdoc he listed me as possibly manic?

I am just 5 points shy of being kicked off disability and hitting the job market for a full time position with health insurance. Is this a threat? Am I an inconvenient patient that could put this pdoc under scrutiny? I do know he is so unpopular that he left his last position to open his own clinic and failed. To better explain this we have the largest shortage of pdocs in my area that I have ever experienced. No pdocs are accepting clients. There used to be an 8 month to one year waiting list. Now, patients leaving hospitals and psych wards are not given a referral.

So it's a no brainer - opening a clinic here is like selling pot in Colorado or ice water in Death Valley. Yet, my pdoc failed miserably and lost his business. At his new position he used to see patients on Monday, now he sees patients for 4 hours on Monday. That has been so unsuccessful that he still has openings for new patients. The rest of his time is inpatient where he is assigned clients and if they don't like it the only other option is to leave -which is a good decision.

I have never felt more crazy in my life, but with my score of 55 I know that I am having moderate issues. According to his notes I have "minimal ability to tolerate being around people."