I Totally get it dolfinlover8!!
I just got a new therapist too. I really like him, but absolutly Do Not know how to open up to him! I have trust and abondonment issues. thats 1 part of the problem. other part is since i was about 15, i decided "I didnt like to feel my feelings" It hurt tooooo much!!! AND NOONE UNDERSTOOD! I got really "good" at it; as I went from substance to substance to make me numb.
Now fast fwd to "today" (some 30 yrs later) I've been clean & sober 13 months! which is Great...But Now I am so stuck! Not only do I NOT KNOW HOW to open up. (If I did) I don't know how to deal with these feelings "I've just opened up" about!...WOW
Anyway...having said all that, I really get it!
just wanted you to know YOU ARE NOT ALONE!

Be Strong Stay Strong