Hello all ...
I have struggled with depression for many years, and depending on what is happening in my life is how deep the depression goes. On top of that, I have Multiple Sclerosis, Osteoarthritis, Fibromyalgia, Migraines, etc, etc, etc ...
It can be and is often overwhelming, and I cannot seem to get a grasp on any of it. I am so tired from seeing so many doctors, and trying to address my pain issues. I hurt 24/7 and get very little relief.
I just found a pain management doctor, who doesn't even want to prescribe muscle relaxers, which do help me when have them. I cry a lot, and sometimes wish "an act of nature" or some other event, would kill me to put me out of my misery. I am NOT suicidal, but I can't stand living this way either.
I feel hopeless at times, and go for days at times, neglecting myself. I am married (no children) and even though my husband knows how I suffer, I believe he has no idea how depressed I truly am. I tell him, I do ... but I think he just can't comprehend just how bad off I am. I feel so alone at times, and pray I can just go to sleep and not wake up.
Can anyone relate to any of this? I know I can't be the only one who feels this way. I only get relief when I am asleep, and unaware of my physical and emotional pain. I dread waking up, only to start the cycle all over again for another day.
Please, if anyone has suggestions, I would very much appreciate to hear what you have to say. Thanks so much.