My anxiety is largely a result of learning how to deal with, and forgive myself for, the things I've done while manic. My mania is so dangerous I am terrified to change meds that are effectively controlling it. My anxiety is then made infinitely worse by the yelling and screaming I endure for being "negative" when the problems are in my head. I will talk to my doctor. I am just terrified that this man I love so much loves the part of me that is sick. It is already extremely difficult for me to continue taking medication that makes me lose my confidence.