I stayed sober for ten yrs, faced a crisis and chose drinking over suicide as a coping method. But I knew this was temporary, and it took me a month to get a handle on the cap hanged thrust upon me. But I did get sober again. That time I discovered fiction writing as a coping method. I would write drunken escapes, I'd write myself drunk to the edge of sanity. And contemplate doing what my rage and fear drove me toward.
I found a wonderful T whom I worked with for seven years, and by then I had confronted and accepted the triggers. Of course new ones come along, but one day (or hour) at a time--and with the constant support of my support group--the past 21 yrs have been much easier than the first ten.
My best to you. You can do this, and it's probably worth the work.
roads
__________________
roads & Charlie
- - and 
|