If you're going to couple's counseling and if you've apologized, you're doing what you can. The best thing you can do on a daily basis is to change your angry, non-consoling behavior. Think about why you shot him down rather than console him. My guess is that you were feeling both anger about his unemployment and unsuccessful job search and anxiety that the situation was not going to get better. So you lashed out at him in a hurtful way.

Unless you address your own anger and fear (or whatever other emotion caused you to lash out rather than console your new husband at his moment of vulnerability) the situation is unlikely to get better.

In couples counseling, I hope you will talk to the therapist about the subject of forgiveness. It may be necessary for you to forgive him for losing his job and not finding a new one. Yeah, it may be something out of his control. But emotions aren't rational and you may find you're blaming him irrationally. You may have to work on forgiving yourself for blowing it at that crucial moment. Okay, you made a mistake. Don't beat yourself up unmercifully. Instead work on doing what you can to make sure you don't keep making the same kind of mistake over and over again.

It also sounds as if he's not willing to forgive you for losing your cool at a crucial moment. That's his mistake. It's a big one.

No marriage is perfect. Married couples do and say things that may hurt each other, small things, things done out of temper or hurt, things that don't mean anything in the long run. Unless both parties can learn to forgive the kinds of emotional mistakes people make all the time, the marriage may not be happy. I'm not talking about laying down and being a doormat for extremely bad behavior. But for hurt feelings and temper flares and not understanding when it would be best to reach out or step back. None of us is superhuman or a mind reader. We all make mistakes. You made a mistake. You failed in the moment. If your H can't forgive you for that moment of failure, well ... his mistake is just as big as yours.

Talk to your therapist, stop crawling, do the right thing, but really honestly and truly, it may be time for your husband to step up and stop making his mistake of acting like an unforgiving guy who's going to punish you forever because his hurt feelings are so much more important than yours.

Right now, as I see it, this is a 50/50 muck up. Please address that in therapy. It's your job to clean up your 50%. Maybe the therapist can help your husband with his 50%.