I'm fine with solitude, but I need a career in music to feel complete in any way and not all of that can be done in solitude. The writing can be done, but I need to perform too.

And I've always had a need to have some sort of relationship/emotional intimacy with another person, but I am beyond able to have a romantic relationship with anyone else because of my aversion/apathy towards sex/touching etc. And to make things worse, I'm not asexual and being in a relationship without any touching would annoy me just as much as one with touching would. At least the former COULD be considered a relationship. Otherwise, only a horrible, horrible person would consider anything that involved physical things to be a relationship. You'd have to hate that person to want to do that to them. And I don't think I'm capable of non-romantic relationships with people either because I've simply lost the ability to give a crap about other people. But then, I'm not a person, so I never had that ability in the first place, right? I'm just a tool to be used…a blow up doll perhaps?

Yes, I'm a thinker so I automatically can't relate to most people. But you'd think I'd relate to other thinkers, wouldn't you? And perhaps we do…until things become physical.