sunny,

Oh, please tell your T about your fantasy/dream. I think you'll enjoy looking at it once you get it out into the open.

The'living up to expectations' is a heavy burden. Tell him too about your feelings around his expectations and worry of disappointing him?

Moving far far away from a source of pain is good... the space can feel like you can finally breathe again! then the pain tracks us down and finds us since we never really left it beause it wasn't out there, it had moved inside.

The thought of feeling that mountain of pain is scary sunny. Please head right at it so you can knock it down. You are strong. Maybe that is what he meant.. you are strong and ready for that. I think your dream is about wanting relief from this overbearing mountain of pain that flows through you like blood but isn't life-sustaining, it is interfering, in the way, like a huge wall. The relief of it will feel tremendous, your dream says. I suspect you are right!



ECHOES