Similar sounding to the situation I was in but we owned a huge house & I had my own bedroom so I didn't have to sleep in the same bed.....honestly I would have slept on the floor before sleeping with him....but that's just me. We lived like that for 13 years before I was finally able to get out after my mother died & my inheritance paid for my way out of the marriage....but because of his messing up with the IRS on the taxes for my inheritance......7 years I have lived 2100 miles away but haven't been able to push through the divorce until now that the IRS payments are over.

Personally I wouldn't mess with someone like him who is so financially messed up....it's likely that he will just end up destroying your life financially in the long run & you will have more headaches than it's really worth to waste time with someone like that.

My H was always bullying with something financial when I went to him wanting to get a divorce....first it was...I'm not selling the house......then just lately, even with divorce being 50/50 & he's actually ended up with everything I have ever owned (I left everything when I moved 7 years ago).....& when I started discussing the asset dissolution for the divorce.....He demanded that his retirement fund was NOT ON THE TABLE....& I was to leave that ALONE......I graciously told him to get a lawyer & our lawyers would discuss it.

Well, he's been living on the overdraft payments to cover his bills....so it's obvious why he demanded I leave the retirement fund along......don't let the guy bully you.....let your lawyer guide you & if your H doesn't have a lawyer.....let yours protect you to the best of his ability & don't let your H get away with anything...as the possibility of his destroying you financially in the end is just so very real......it's not worth it to stay in marriages like that where you can't trust the guy even financial infidelity is just as bad as relational infidelity & it destroys trust.....& you can't have a working marriage where there is NO TRUST.

Even if you were to have counseling....I doubt that your H would even grasp the concepts being offered.....from my personal experience.....I would say...get the divorce & get on with your own life.