i used to work in a psych hospital and we would have occasional patients from women's shelters. NO ONE deserves to be abused. i've never had one woman tell me anything bad enough for me to believe that she needed to have the crap beaten out of her or screamed and yelled at.

i also picked up on what Juliana said, you sound as if you've given up and you're just going to stay. please don't. it isn't going to get better. it's going to get a lot worse. look around you for resources. save what you can. find the nearest shelter. make plans. you have to plan leaving. and you need an ally. a counselor in a shelter will talk to you and listen.

please take care of yourself and keep us updated........xoxoxo pat