Hello Oreosalad,
Been were you at right now many many times. All of us here do really care if you have a therapist it might be a good idea to contact them and let him/her know how you are feeling. As my therapist has told me many times feelings are just feelings (they will pass) they are not facts you are truly not alone. Your feelings are very valid though and it is hard to not see them as real. Why don't you tell me a little about yourself I would love to hear. Please know you are not alone hang in there.