Hey thanks all (and yup I'm back pinksoil -- been thinking about your other thread in fact and will respond to it soon).

DePressMe: Unlike in your case, I have no doubts about my individual therapist. He's perfect for me and he's really good at what he does. He's probably even right that I should be in group. And regarding money: He has several times now offered not to bill me for group (just for individual). Last time I talked about quitting he asked what if it was just the time and would I come if he didn't bill me and all I had to invest was time. So far I haven't let him do that (though I might if things become rough financially for me). But at the moment, it's not the finances -- it's just that I don't feel like doing it. He thinks I'll learn something valuable about conflict. Because (surprise!) I avoid all conflict in the group. Maybe he has some delusion that I will suddenly up & decide to participate in whatever conflict is going on. Never going to happen. I don't do conflict. If the group members start arguing some issue, I just say nothing. Heck, I doubt I could get interested enough to join in their battles anyway.

Yes, that's when I get annoyed. When there's some argument. They'll just argue some subject to death, and I'm thinking what's the point. People are different and they can't change each other. Why burn up all that energy.

Pinksoil: Yeah I do notice my interactions mimic some of the ones outside of group. The big difference here is I'm not making polite small-talk. I'm just shutting up. I was thinking earlier that it's difficult for me to break off relationships. I mean, even if I've only been dating some dude for a few weeks I have a hard time saying hey this isn't working. And so I can't bring up that I want to quit here. And I may just be full of crap -- it might be the whole power-balance thing is bugging the hell out of me and so I shift that onto wanting to quit. And the whole announcing-you're-going-to-quit thing is what everybody does when they want attention. I hate that. I'd rather just quietly walk out.

BLAH. I think the whole thing is just messing with my head and after a while that makes me angry. And then I'm horribly ornery about everything. My therapist asked me something about couldn't I learn to do some type of interaction (I forget exactly what we were talking about but it was something with the group), and I said no I don't think I can learn, I think that's beyond me, etc. Of course I don't think that! This whole thing is just annoying!!!

GRRRRR.

Sidony

P.S. Pinksoil: Yes I've already picked out what I'm going to wear tomorrow. haha