I don't know if anyone else has mentioned this---but I have found Prochaska's Trans-theoretical Model of Change helpful. It will tell you NO. You are simply at a certain place in the change process (and the stages can go out of order, or fall back and forward over time) What this guy did was: he studied theories on how people change, and picked out the commonalities in all the theories; using this be built a model that sounds long-winded but is pretty straight forward. No one is a "loser", no one is in the "wrong place"...and the goal of someone helping people to change is to know where the person is at, and to offer only those strategies that are useful to the person at that particular stage. He did put this into a popular book that is called, I believe "Changing for Good".
Just one more resource.