Hey SecretGarden!

I missed your response before somehow. Wow, that's a lot of time in group!

Yeah, it's weird having the therapist as the group leader, but I doubt seriously I would ever have joined a group otherwise. I mean, I'm just really shy. But since I trust him and he bugged me to try it I finally did. And part of my problem is social anxiety. I get so nervous about talking to people that nothing comes into my head. I don't imagine that it would work much better with any other group, unless maybe we were all brand-new (that somehow sounds freeing to me).

I don't know what it is that bugs me. They all seem really touchy to me. Like if I said "hello" in the wrong tone half the room might take offense or something. I don't know. The least little thing has them talking about jealousy and anger and all that. And I guess that's the POINT. That's also the reason I'm uncomfortable -- it takes a lot to provoke me emotionally and so I don't understand reaching those stages so quickly. I also don't understand how people don't intuitively understand how not to provoke other people. Like I hear them say something and I'm immediately thinking "oh god what a wrong thing to say." I think I learned to tread carefully a long time ago, and it's hard for me to understand that other people either don't know how to do that or don't think it's necessary. The few times I've felt annoyed enough not to bother to speak carefully I felt regretful afterward. Ugh.

Sidony