Hi. Thank you all for your input. I did get a lot of help from alanon. I learned to remove myself from the situation and not take his drinking personally. We had one good counseling session where the therapist brought up the deluth wheel of abuse. This was back when we were both using and he was much more verbally abusive. He got very upset and cried which is WAY out of character for him. He used to always say let's go our separate ways. The last time I said yeah bipolars have a 3x's higher rate of divorce and this is your 2nd marriage so between us we have a 20% chance of making it work. He back peddled really fast. Marriage counseling is not helpful because he underestimates his drinking being a functional alcoholic. I quit AA, but when I was a member he said I'm not like those people because I get up and go to work everyday Duh! When I left the psych ward last yr they said my prognosis was fair because I was returning to an unhealthy household. That hurt. Also, I knew people in AA all about divorcing over drinking. I took my vows with sickness and health, it's hard for partners to be with me because of the bipolar and such, plus on disability I'd have to move in with my parents EEK!!!