Not even the simplest tasks that I KNOW I CAN DO!! There's a big fat mental block here composed of anxiety/ADD/misdiagnoses?/giving myself an excuse/laziness and I can't get around it. I don't even know where to begin. I should be working now but it's 1 in the %#@&#! morning and I wake up at five and I got maybe one or two hours of sleep last night and my history teacher is a ***** and I HATE THE GUILT but I can't fix the problem!!

I just want to go back a couple months and start therapy then. Maybe it'll help, but I have so many doubts. I need to break this stupid vicious cycle ("mental block"=can't work, can't work=unfinished stuff=more anxiety=can't work... eventually leading to midnight work sessions that never finish anything=guilt=no self esteem=bigger mental block=can't work...) but I don't know how.

I feel bad about how much I rant on these forums. I should be so much happier than I am, considering the fact that my life is 90-99% perfect. It's so dumb, I have everything and yet... bleh.

Thanks for listening, those who read this. You're amazing, you really truly are!
love,
~muse