I guess it's beyond my comprehension as to why you'd put up with being used by a guy in order to avoid being alone? I'm not judging----I mean, if you were 21, wouldn't everyone be telling you to not settle for some guy just to not feel so alone? (I'm a bit puzzled as to some of the advice given, as it does seem the responses are different because of your age.) And to boot, the guy isn't just using you, but your husband, too? I'm not judging your situation, rather I don't understand why you are being this guys sugar mama but getting no sugar. Do you realize that while you're wasting time on this loser that a truly great guy could pass right under your nose, but because you're so preoccupied with loser guy in an attempt to not be alone, you will never know if something wonderful has passed you by.