I went to the Fourth of July fireworks with my husband and daughter. I always enjoy the fireworks but I had to make myself get in the spirit of things because my depression, after a period of getting better made a harsh turn for the worse. It's aggravating that a depressive episode can seem to set in around a holiday, when you have stuff to do and would like to enjoy yourself. Anyhow, I understand how you feel and how these things go.