You might be able to get some help from a therapist who specializes in sexual issues, including sexual fetishes. You might also be able to learn more by googling terms like adult baby, diaper lover and paraphilic infantilism. I looked and there are countless articles, ranging from scholarly articles to fetish sites.

I don't think your son needs to be committed. Nor do I think you've failed as a parent. Your son has a fetish that seems to be more common than I would ever have imagined.

My own child displayed a fetish that made my hair stand on end. My goal was to learn what I could about it, become as accepting as possible and -- most importantly to me as a parent -- guiding in such a way that would encourage the use of sound judgment and avoidance of dangerous people in the fetish community who might not have honorable intentions. It worked out okay. That doesn't mean I liked it, but nothing really bad happened. I don't count my shocked values and morality as really bad. It was just something I'd never come up against before. I really was shocked. But I got over it and everything turned out okay.

It may sound absurd to talk about encouraging sound judgment while he engages in a fetish that seems all wrong to you. But there can be good and bad decisions all along the way. Help your son make as many good, safe decisions as possible.

And, you know, it really wouldn't hurt to apologize for the comments about committing him. You panicked. It's a shock when it's something you never heard of before. But, apparently, it's not all that uncommon. Go google. See what you can find out. That's how I started when faced with a fetish in my own family. But I don't want to give you the wrong impression that I was all calm and cool acceptance in the start. My hair was standing on end. At the crucial moment, I was so upset I was speechless. That allowed me to come across as much cooler and more accepting than I felt. Apparently, my eyes merely felt as if they were bugging out of my head. I could barely remember to breathe. But over time, things worked out okay.

You'll figure this out. You've been doing something right because there seems to be much better communication about a very difficult topic than there would be in many families. Give yourself some credit and from this day forward try to move ahead remembering he's still the son you've loved from Day One.