This is my first time posting in one of these forums and thats a little scary but frankly, I need help. For the last few years I feel like I've been on a rollercoaster of highs and lows, moments when I feel ok and can laugh and enjoy life, but then weeks at a time where I feel like I'm living in a fog, nearly always on the brink of tears or completely apathetic to everything around me. I always just thought this was part of being a teenager, but its become unbearable. I have no energy, I sleep all day, and I have no passion inside of me. I don't know how express affection to those I care about and I feel completely emotionless around family and others I'm supposed to care about. I used to love to read and learn, but now I don't even have the energy to read more than a few pages. I party whenever I can because it helps me forget, but I'm fully aware I'm using alcohol as a crutch and that fills me with guilt. I constantly worry that I'm on the brink of unraveling and am scared that I'll never be able to combat this. I asked my mom if I could start seeing a therapist, but I can't even open up to her about this. I feel like I'm being dramatic and that should just be able to snap out of this, but I don't know what to do. I just feel like I'm wasting away but I don't know if this is something that everyone is going through around me, or if I really need help?
Any input/advice would be appreciated, thank you