Hi. I'm new to this site. I suffer from depression and anxiety. Right now my depression is at it's worse that its been at in years. I was hospitalized 4 weeks ago for suicidal thoughts. What I want to know is how to you engage in life when all I want to do is stay in bed and shut out the world. This is very hard for me cause I have 2 young children. My husband is extremely supportive, yet I feel very guilty for being like this now. I've had depression since a teenager on and off, so I know it will get better but right now I feel like I'm trapped at the bottom of a very deep hole and can't get out.

To make matters worse, my parents and sister don't believe in mental illness so they have no clue what's going on. Yet they are phoning constantly to come over. I'm off work this week to rest up, yet I can't tell them that because if they ever found out it would be horrible. They would blame me and basically say that I'm stressing them out and how could I do that to them and why don't I just suck it up.

I just want to wake up one morning and want to get up and out of bed. I'm currently on meds and my pdoc upped my doses, so I'm hoping it will help.