So today has been a trying day. Work, wife wanted to take a step back from our relationship. I lost it panic attack blood pressure through the roof had to leave work 1hour early. Got home talked to wife. She's overwhelmed by dealing with my "issues". Working on taking a step back. Been going away dealing with all of this for over a year. Am going to talk to therapist about taking a vacation to focus on my marriage and trying to make me feel better. My nurse thinks it's a good idea. Am trying to find my wife a therapist so she can have someone to talk to. We are better now that we've talked, but I'm not going to work tomorrow per nurse. Emotional upheavals make me so exhausted. Wife and I are going to do things that make us happy. I hate that everything is feeding my depression. Ready to sleep for several hours.