I don't really know why anyone would have an urge to chew you out here. It is your life and money and if you choose to spend it like you described, it is none of anyone else's concern.
It would seem to me if you wanted to stop it, you could confess to the therapist what you have written here or go to another therapist and tell that one.
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Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live.
Oscar Wilde
Well Behaved Women Seldom Make History - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich
Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.
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