We are totally open and honest and I should have put more detail on why she can't. She has had 5 pregnancies, all high risk pregnancies. Her doctor is a high risk doctor that was completely surprised she even made it through the last pregnancy. Her family are all small boned women, her sister lost so much blood on her last (5th) birth she almost died, her cousin also had 5 pregnancies and her 5th left her bleeding on her bathroom floor so weak she couldn't pick up a phone to call for help. Luckily her husband came home in time... anyway, I know she can't, and even if she agreed to it I do NOT want her on the verge of death to just give me a baby so I'd be happy. I'm not sure her kids' father (which we won't get into how abusive, manipulative, shot his gun at her even with their 3 yr old in the house he is) would allow me to adopt his kids. He still says it's his house, his wife, his kids. He hates that "I'm sleeping with his wife and raising his kids" he tells her. I feel like I'd just be dad number 2 though I'd be spending the 95% of the time with them. I don't know if they could love me like their dad, even if they say they wish I was their dad. When they get older and understand I'm not their biological dad, what kind of things are they gonna feel towards me? Any stepchildren here that could give me a clue?