Yup, I have heard the exact same story as mine and yours a thousand times. I can be candid because I have told my story hundreds of times. Your grandmother is right. You are being very truthful with us and yourself which is the first step in how to overcome it. Admitting it is a problem.

For me it took a bottom, a treatment center, and AA. And it worked. I have 19 years sober now.

A bottom can be any bottom doesn't have to be rock bottom. I would suggest making a list of all the ways, positive and negative, that alcohol affects you and your life. We do get some positive benefit from it in a way, meaning we do it for some reason, or else why would we do it. The problem is the negative consequences. Health, work, relationships, how we feel about ourselves, hang overs, drunk drivings, etc etc.....The shame ate me up because I knew I needed to stop but couldn't.