By "we" i meant people who feels like i do. I never said that everyone is the same.
Okay i think that being in therapy and attaching to t is miserable. You all just say why its not miserable for you. Does it change something to me? No. Iif you dont feel this way its great of course but does it prove that therapy abd any attachment to t isnt miserable? No.
At least i understood that the biggest problem is that im sure its miserable and i always thought this way thats why i felt so bad. I tried to kill myself because i felt too miserable and hated myself for this.
I lied to my t that i feel nothing for him when he asked me and i was sure i would kill myself after my confession that im attached to him.

Now i look at my pills and getting sick of it. Im too young to taked meds, its so miserable that i cant sleep without xanax.

And there are people who has the same issues and i call them "we". But you just think about youself and prove that you are better (i dont talk about specially you, i meant some of people here who says things like that). Do i need this? No. I dont need arguments why YOU arent miserable but why IT is or isnt miserable.

I still feel the same. I still ask myself am i miserable? Is my actions miserable? Is it miserable to say "i love you" to person who is a t? Is it miserable to bother him with my emails?
My t of course says its not miserable but i still feel like a junk.