my closet friend
she knows im in pain
she knows its going terribly wrong
and yet she doesnt say
she stays silent
in her world
afraid of what i do not know
and i cant tell her
that im going down
that im losing ground
that im fading fast
i dont want to hurt her again
its too hard
its too much
how many more times is she gonna last
so i will hold out until she goes
till she leaves for her travels
until im alone
just gotta make it one day at a time
afraid that i cant
afraid
im a horrible friend
i hate being like this
i cant even smile now
i cant even laugh
nothin inside me even feels like i can
i just want to curl up and die
im sick of hurting everyone around