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Jul 10, 2014, 11:51 AM
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Member Since: Feb 2012
Location: From Egypt, journeying in America
Posts: 244
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SteinerofThule, your words reflect a lot of depression & frustration, but you don't seem stupid to me, 'cause you express yourself & write very well. I think you have very low confidence in yourself because of the depression you've got...
21 is really young, you've got your whole life still ahead of you. And your parents will not always be there for you, try to take it one step at a time to start being independent, & I agree with the others that the first step is to seek help with a psychotherapist.
I know it's very easy to give up to darkness & depression, as I always fall into this myself. But I try to finish what I got ahead of me (work & study), ignoring my bad feelings, & I imagine myself being like a robot that finishes its task without any feelings of hope or self-esteem...etc. And eventually after a few days, or even weeks, something good shows up & I get feeling good again 
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