How awful for you.

First, have you recently seen your primary physician? Please do. Be honest with him/her.
Have you had a thorough physical exam with blood tests in this year? Sounds like a first order of business to schedule and follow through. Your physical health is important to ascertain.

Your doctor can refer you for further mental/emotional evaluation with specialists. Perhaps the right combination of meds and therapy is still worth another go, vs continuing to live such a limited existence as you describe.

I hope that you will seek help, Steiner of Thule.