Sounds like the separation of locations is so she has freedom to come and go, as she pleases, while having you in her back pocket for security measures. Dating is such an emotionally vulnerable endeavor.
Keeps you, unable to grieve and move on with life, giving hope for reconciliation. Granted through couples counseling, many couples overcome infidelity. Is reconciliation from infidelity, something that sticks in the back of your mind, as how you'd like to view your past romantic history with her, 10,15,20 years down the road? The fantasy effect of proclaiming, at those stages, how tough you both are together? Sometimes, in that reconciliation phase, there's a power shift, and the relationship is never the same, and guilt, shame, unworthiness. Eats at the spouse that cheated. Depression sometimes comes in. Relationships are typically not the same after an affair.
Just something to consider...

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