Hey all,

Does anyone have any advice on how to start finding new relationships? I'd seriously appreciate any ideas anyone can offer. I'm in my early 30s, male, and single, and I don't know where to start.

I'm literally alone in the world. My family's been twisted and abusive to me my whole life, the friends I made were like the people in my family (as in, not good!), and I'm single right now. The fact that I'm alone in the world has been freaking me out my whole life ... like, I had to raise myself when I was a kid. No one cared if I lived or died, family messed with my head sociopath-style, that whole deal. Pretty screwed up stuff.

I've spent every.single.day for the past four years working through the consequences of my "upbringing", and now here I am. I'm seeing my issues with a clearer lens finally, and the most important issue to me is the fact that I'm seriously, truly alone in the world. And it sucks! It's terrible. Relationships are the most important thing to me in my life, I'm definitely a very social person who values strong, positive connections with other people, but right now I'm sorta at square one here.

A little more about my situation: Live in the suburbs right now just outside NYC. I'm thinking of moving back to NYC because it's easier for me to find people I have things in common with and I had some almost successes when I lived there, but I bungled it by my anxiety, depression, scapegoat identity, PTSD, whatever you want to call it. I have a better grip on this stuff now than I did then, so I'd like to give things another shot. My job is filled with anti-social jerks, ala my family (funny how you keep finding these people...), so co-workers aren't an option til I find a better working environment.

Is it still possible to find new relationships at this age? I'm in my early 30s and a guy. I feel sorta weird and "not right" about the fact that I have to go out and find a new "family" or relationship life from scratch. Just seems like everyone's got their life set up already and they're just done with things.

I know luck didn't fall on my side due to being born to a family of aggressive, anti-social brainwashing jerks, but I have to be honest, I feel a little stigmatized here and that's a nice chunk of my anxiety and hopelessness about this.

Anyway, thank you for reading this, and I'm looking forward to any ideas anyone has to offer!