I fear i am too much for my T. My problems are too big, my needs are too many.

Early on I *told* her that if she invited me to leave phone messages that I feared I would leave too many... Yet, she said, "We ( the office ) will handle it." "Call me if you need me." "I want you to talk to me every time you want to."

But today she mentioned the many messages made during the week... and she sighed. I hadn't asked her to call me back, either...it's just a way for me to get my anxiety outside of myself and put it away. I want her to know the questions that come up and how I am feeling.

Ok, well, I'll stop calling. Not in a pouty way, either. I think she will be great for me and I don't want to lose her.

I guess I can make notes of thoughts and bring them in each week. But that keeps me holding on to the anxiety/depression all week. Issues and memories get stirred up when I see T and it makes me anxious and depressed. Real life issues happen and it makes me anxious and depressed. Talk about specific abuse issues during therapy and tell me if you don't hold on to remnants of it the rest of the week? It's like having a nightmare and still being scared for a while after you wake up. And, sometimes, new bad memories tumble out.

We are still getting to know each other.
But I still fear I am too much for her.
Sometimes I feel like a bad patient.