I don't really know how to explain how I feel. I'm back as sick as I was last time my anorexia got out of hand. I can't believe I've let it get this way. I thought I could just snap out of it but I can't. I wish this disease would have just killed me the first time. I'm sick of it. I just want to be able to eat again without purging or feeling awful about myself. I'm tired of trying to reach a goal that isn't attainable.

Vent over.

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