I hope that it is not rude of me to suggest this, but is it possible that you have a lesbian crush on your friend? Needing and craving her presence so strongly seems to hint at something more than "just" friendship.

Regardless of how strongly you love her, it is not healthy to have social needs that only one person can meet. I've been there before. I've also lost friends due to acting "crazy"; what I've realized is that those people weren't very nice people to begin with, and I am better off without them.