I can't see how my bipolar would be affected by my pets not listening. If I was in an irritable hypomania then I'd be less patient I'm sure, but they wouldn't be the cause of the irritable hypomania.
It just sounds like you're an impatient owner, and don't seem to have the maturity to handle your frustration in a mature/responsible/productive way (I'm sorry, I know that sounds super offensive, but it's the best way I can think of to word it!).
Animals are animals - they do not understand English. They require a lot of patience and repetition, and those two things always need to be present. Consistency is highly important. They aren't being rude or disrespectful - they are behaving like animals. Which is what they are. You can't expect them to behave or comprehend the way that humans do - you need to go more onto their level and show them that you are the dominant animal in the household - which takes the consistency.
Animals frequently feed off the general emotions surrounding them - if you're angry and thinking violently and very high-strung, your animals will be too. If you indulge in yelling at them or destroying things or hurting them, you'll also foster a fearful environment which will only have them become harder to manage. Your reactions to them are making the problem worse. They won't accept you as the alpha if they're scared of you, because they will either want to get away or take over to show you how to behave properly yourself!
Like.... I even have my cat (notoriously hard to train those stubborn critters!!) a bit trained - he knows that when I say "NO!" or "GET DOWN!" in a certain tone of voice... well, he knows to knock it off or get off whatever he's on. Usually he backtalks me, but I repeat the sentence and down he gets. If it's something like biting it will be "NO!" combined with putting him down (or shoving him off the couch) and then ignoring him for a bit.
So... tips really? Well, to start with: you can learn how to be a good pet owner!! It's totally possible
1. be patient.
2. be consistent
3. be firm
4. remember that they are animals
5. don't yell or hit or anything else violent.
6. only give rewards and treats for listening to your commands
7. start with teaching one command at a time. Don't try to teach "sit" and "lay down!" at the same time because it could be overwhelming.
8. have reasonable expectations of them - everyone learns at their own speed.
9. there is a lot of repetition required
10. have a consisten thing to say when you aren't happy with their behaviour. "NO!" with the same tone of voice - they notice the tone of voice more so than other things.
11. Once they know a command enough to listen to it when offered a reward, slowly start making the reward random (where sometimes you'll give them a treat, other times not). They need this progression so that they'll never know if they'll get a treat or not - they might just stop listening if they KNOW they'll never get a treat... but you want them to listen at all times and not just when they see the treat.
12. If you're trying to teach and find yourself getting frustrated... just stop. Go and do something else. Don't keep at it because you'll both just get stressed out and more angry.