I completely get what you are talking about. I lived in what seemed like a depressive stupor for so long, just no interest for anything. No motivation. I just pushed myself through each day because I had no choice.

It has gotten better for the most part, but it has taken years of pretty intensive therapy, some meds along the way. I'm not sure exactly when it started turning around. I guess it was after having finally worked through all of my old stuff that kept me stuck in that depressive pattern.

I feel for you. I hope you'll eventually be able to find some help and see some movement in your depression. You're in a bad spot in really difficult circumstances. It can get better though, but I know it's hard to see that hope right now.